Question 1

Couples and Marriage

Accepted Answer

Books related to Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (my model):
Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships  – Sue Johnson
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love – Sue Johnson
Created For Connection: The “Hold Me Tight” Guide for Christian Couples – Sue Johnson and Kenneth Sanderfer
Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy for Dummies – Brent Bradley and James Furrow
An Emotionally Focused Workbook for Couples: The Two of Us – Veronica Kallos-Lilly and Jennifer Fitzgerald
Other books that I’ve found helpful for couples:
How We Love: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage  (Christian) – Milan and Kay Yerkovich
After the Affair – Janis Abrahms Spring and Michael Spring
The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps – Melissa Orlov

Question 2

Relationship Issues (General)

Accepted Answer

Boundaries(Christian) – Henry Cloud
Codependent No More – Melody Beattie
Escaping Toxic Guilt – Susan Carrell
Emotional Blackmail – Susan Forward
The Betrayal Bond – Patrick Carnes

Question 3

Parenting Books and Services

Accepted Answer

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids – Laura Markham
The Explosive Child A new approach for understanding and parenting easily frustrated children – Ross Greene, PhD
Love and Logic – Book Series by Foster Cline and Jim Fay, additional information at www.loveandlogic.com
1-2-3 Magic (2-12 year olds) – Thomas Phelan
Parenting From the Inside Out – Daniel Siegel
No-Drama Discipline – Daniel Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
How to Talk so Kids will Listen and How to Listen so Kids will Talk – Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
How to Talk so Teens will Listen and How to Listen so Teens will Talk – Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish
TiLT Parenting – Debbie Reber (podcast, blog and newsletter for parent's raising "differently wired" kids)
Seth Perler - Excutive Function Coach (information for parents and children with executive function challenges)
Parents Helping Parents–  help for parents with special needs children

Question 4

Trauma

Accepted Answer

Waking the Tiger – Peter Levine
I Can’t Get Over It: A Handbook for Trauma Survivors – Aphrodite Matsakis
The Betrayal Bond – Patrick Carnes (help for relational trauma and abuse)

Question 5

Grief

Accepted Answer

Kara - Grief support for children, teens, families and adults (Palo Alto, CA)
The Year of Magical Thinking – Joan Didion
It's OK That You're Not OK: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand – Megan Devine
The Orphaned Adult: Understanding And Coping With Grief And Change After The Death Of Our Parents – Alexander Levy
Straight Talk about Death for Teenagers: How to Cope with Losing Someone You Love – Earl A. Grollman
A Parent's Guide to Raising Grieving Children: Rebuilding Your Family after the Death of a Loved One – Phyllis Rolfe Silverman
I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye: Surviving, Coping and Healing After the Sudden Death of a Loved One – Brook Noel
The Other Side of Sadness: What the New Science of Bereavement Tells Us About Life After Loss – George A. Bonanno 
The Invisible String – Patrice Karst (children's book)
How To Go On Living When Someone You Love Dies – Therese A. Rando

Question 6

Managing Emotion and Self-esteem

Accepted Answer

Living Like You Mean It – Ronald Frederick
It’s Not Always Depression – Hilary Jacobs Hendel
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem – Nathaniel Branden
The Happiness Trap – Russ Harris
Anxiety, Phobias, and Panic – Reneau Peurifoy
Stress Free for Good – Fred Luskin and Kenneth Pelletier
The How of Happiness – Sonja Lyubomirsky
Overcoming Depression One Step at a Time – Michael Addis and Christopher Martell
Overcoming Depression – Paul Gilbert
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life – Mark Manson (This book is not for those who are uncomfortable with profanity. If that doesn’t bother you, Mark makes some good points in an original way.)
Emotion and Physical Pain
Unlearn Your Pain – Howard Schubiner MD and Michael Betzold
When the Body Says No – Gabor Maté
Personality:
Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength – Laurie Helgoe
Please Understand Me – David Keirsey and Marilyn Bates

Question 7

Shame and Perfectionism

Accepted Answer

The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are – Brene Brown
Living Like You Mean It – Ronald Frederick
It’s Not Always Depression – Hilary Jacobs Hendel
Shame & Guilt: Masters of Disguise – Jane Middelton-Moz
Letting Go of Shame: Understanding How Shame Affects Your Life – Potter-Efron
Too Perfect: When Being in Control Gets Out of Control – Allan E. Mallinger and Jeannette Dewyze.
Tools for assessing and developing self-compassion (an antidote to both)

Question 8

Eating, Weight, and Body Image Issues"

Accepted Answer

How to Have your Cake and your Skinny Jeans Too – Josie Spinardi (Excellent guide on intuitive eating if you ignore the emphasis on “skinny”)
The Obesity Code – Unlocking the Secrets of Weight Loss – Jason Fung
Overcoming Overeating – Jane R. Hirschmann & Carol H. Munter
Embrace Documentary on Women’s Body Image

Question 9

Addiction Books and Services

Accepted Answer

Addict In The Family – Beverly Conyers
Everything Changes: Help for Families of Newly Recovering Addicts – Beverly Conyers
It Will Never Happen To Me – Claudia Black (for children of alcoholics)
Sober Siblings: How to Help Your Alcoholic Brother or Sister-and Not Lose Yourself – Patricia Olsen, Petros Levounis M.D.
Willpower Is Not Enough – Arnold Washton
Boundaries(Christian) – Henry Cloud
Codependent No More – Melody Beattie

Question 10

Mindfulness and Meditation

Accepted Answer

Calm - Free app for meditation and relaxation
Insight Timer - Free app for mediation and relaxation
UCSD Free Mindfulness Audios and Videos
UCLA Free Mindful Awareness Audios
Create Inner Peace: Self-Hypnosis Relaxation by Glenn Harrold
Free app: Relax and Sleep Well by Glenn Harrold
Spire Stress Management Device (Bio-Feedback Using the Breath)
Inner Balance Device (Bio-Feedback using Heart-Rate Variability)
Meditation Oasis Podcast – Free podcast about meditation and other interesting material
Mindfulness for Beginners – Jon Kabat-Zinn, Audio CD
Guided Mindfulness Meditation: A Complete Program – Jon Kabat-Zinn, Audio CD
 
Mindful Stretching / Exercise to reduce anxiety and stress:
Yoga with Adriene – Adriene Mishler (free)
Yoga for Your Week – Rodney Yee (DVD)
A.M. and P.M. Yoga For Beginners – Rodney Yee (DVD)
The Ultimate Yogi(Advanced Yoga) – Travis Eliot (DVD set) 
Yoga Journal’s Beginning Yoga Step by Step– Yoga Journal (DVD set)
Somatics: Reawakening The Mind’s Control of Movement, Flexibility, and Health– Thomas Hanna

Question 11

Favorite TED Talks

Accepted Answer

The art of being yourself – Caroline McHugh 
What I learned from 100 days of rejection – Jia Jiang
The less you own, the more you have – Angela Horn
The power of vulnerability – Brene Brown
A few other short videos that I have found to be helpful:
Empathy (An RSA Short) – Brene Brown
Blame (An RSA Short) – Brene Brown
Why we behave the worst in the relationships that matter the most:
The “stillface experiment” in this clip shows what happens for an infant (and in all of us, just in a more adult version!) when we feel disconnected from those we love.

David Michalicek, M.A.
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
1885 The Alameda, San Jose, CA
408.628.9179

Resources

Additional Resources